I subbed today. So, after the call just before 6, I started getting ready for the day. I was totally prepared – snacks, books, all my letters of recommendation and job search info. I placed them all in my bag and headed out.
I got to the school and was ready to go for the first class. Once I got them started on their assignment, I decided to grab one of my books to read and my extra special morning drink. I pulled the book out of my bag and after placing it on the podium, realized that the book was wet. I thought it was just a fluke, so I wiped down the podium. However, I then realized that it was too much liquid and stickiness for a fluke. I looked at my nalgene and realized that there was 2 ounces missing, the cap was wet, and recalled I had only taken a single sip.
Crap! I headed back to my bag to see the damage. I took out everything from my bag and began wiping off the liquid that wasn’t absorbed. I became more and more annoyed as I looked at the results. I know you are probably wondering what the big deal was, I mean, come on, it wasn’t that much liquid. The problem wasn’t the amount, the problem was my extra special liquid – pomegranate and blueberry juice. Purple was everywhere. Let me remind you what I had in my bag. 1) All my letters of recommendation for my never ending job search. B) Two library books.
I now was faced with the agony that I have to go to the library (let me remind you of my issues with the library regarding internet users and the librarian who hates me) and ask what I should do about their purple books – one was on loan from another library. If I wanted to purchase the books, I would not have gone to the library. I am not going to even start on the letters of recommendation except to say that I just decided I wouldn't take a day off from filling out applications.
With everything taken out of the bag and wiped down, I took a deep breath and looked down – at my white shirt. The joy never ends.
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5 comments:
I did that(ish) once. Mine was water. It was about 6 ounces, and it successfully ruined:
1) one wallet
2) one cellular phone
3) one semester of class notes
4) one bag (even though it was water, it stole the color from my burgundy folder and spread it to everything else) and
5) some cash.
Never mind about the bag. Now that I'm remembering correctly, that was ruined when a pen exploded.
I'm sorry! Let me tell you about my dumbness. I was talking to the sample guy at Whole Foods. I was eating the bread with olive oil he offered me. I dribbled the oil on my shirt in front of the guy.. The redeeming thing was that I didn't realize the spot until later! Oops.
Suckage.
I would like to suggest that the redeeming factor in Jen's story is that she actually has a Whole Foods.
Also, spilled coffee down my white sweater this morning in front of some middle school students. They laughed. I sent one of them to get paper towels to clean my mess.
Al, I've heard that administrators love the smell of blueberries and pomegranite juice. It shows you are highly recommended and a delicous hire.
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