I am 29 years old now, and I have realized a couple of things:
1) I want a job that pays me to read. I think this is a job I could do and enjoy. Plus, I could read anywhere like on safari in Africa or India (reoccuring dreams). Also, I could like read a lot one week and then take a week off. Thus, I could potentially (Keep in mind this is my ideal job) have a schedule similar to the teaching schedule I love so much. So, if anyone knows of a job where I will be paid to read, send me the info. And, I know I have been reading the Shopaholic series, but I really can read all types of literature: mystery, pop lit, young adult lit, kid's lit, the classics, etc.
2) I have decided I want a boyfriend for football season. Now reason with me here. Fall is a great time to start dating because:
a) it is not nearly as romantic as spring when everything is in bloom, and,
b) it isn't plagued by a million weddings which add stress to a relationship.
c) football season is only a couple of months long, and anyone can endure me for a couple of months.
d) As to holidays, nobody really celebrates Sweetest Day; I already have plans for Thanksgiving since Jen, Mike and Derek are coming, so he would totally be off the hook; and, by Christmas or New Year's at the least, everything is so busy that we could just skip it or we could be broken up by that time since we have to be done by the end of football season (that would cross the horrendous Val's Day off the list of concerns, too), what's a few weeks early.
e) I wouldn't be stressed all football season for lack of having a boyfriend, I would have a whole new type of stress (see reason h);
f) I would actually be a girlfriend willing to watch football;
g) I bring assets to the table (I did mean the t, but the other is probably true, too);
h) I can pretend to not be a total psychopath, high-maintenance idiot for a couple of months at least (or at least hide it semi decently till playoff time when I need to start looking for a reason to break up, but realistically the real me will probably have started to leak out, so break-up ensured!).
I just don't see any problem with the boyfriend for football season plan. So, like above, if you know of an appropriate candidate, contact me.
3) I need to get my life together. I am freaking 29 years old. I should not be this big of a mess. I need to be a mature adult and productive member of society.
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2 comments:
i like the football season theory:
1. fall is a time when you start covering up, not stripping down.
2. the short season theory is nice. a clean break could be easily blamed on poor team performance or favre withdrawal.
3. its okay to eat rich heavy foods in the fall.
the only problem is you can't honestly tell me that spring is more romantic than back to school season... new paper smell, pens full of ink, folders, calculators, crayon wax, that section in the back of target with the massive boxes of notebooks... yeah, back to school definitely has spring beat.
oh, and if you find that reading job, let me know. i want in on that action.
First, I am sure there must be a job that pays you to read...particularly if you'd be willing to do some editing while reading (though I know that is not quite what you have in mind...). You could look for jobs with publishers, maybe. Or maybe you could look for a job with a magazine or something that needs someone to read and write reviews. I'll keep thinking though...
Second, I totally agree about football season being the perfect time for a boyfriend - for many of the reasons you stated, but particularly b/c fall is such a low-pressure time of year for relationships (no big gift-giving or family-meeting holidays, etc...basically nothing that forces unnecessary commitments...=) ).
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