I Have No Willpower

Maybe a better title is that I have no willpower for certain things - like Pride and Prejudice. That movie is like crack to me. Every time I see it is going to be on (which is practically every other day on cable, multiple times a day), I tell myself I am not going to watch it again. And then, there I am, watching it. This presents MANY problems:

1) it makes me want to live in England again;

2) besides the initial suckage of time (last Saturday I switched between P & P and the Olympics so not as much time suckage as usual), every couple of times that I see parts of the newest P & P, I remember how much I like the old one and end up watching all five hours of it, and then contemplate watching Sense and Sensibility, Clueless, Emma, Bridget Jone's Diary, and Bride and Prejudice;

3) P & P gives me unrealistic expectations about all of the people that I meet - the ones that initially I like and the ones that I don't like initially;

4) P & P lures me into unrealistic expectations of life (although I have become really good at justifying the fact that everyone in Austen's books have servants, because don't we all - we have cars, dishwashers, washing machines, stores, etc.);

5) Seeing the promos for P & P makes me mad - who likes it when someone tells you major plot points of a movie or a book. I remember blacking out a major plot point on all 60 copies of The Scarlet Letter before handing them out to my students, I was so ticked that day!;

6) It makes me think that one of the sexiest/best scenes in film is the minutes surrounding the lake scene - how disturbing/odd is that;

7) I start to wonder how much they cut for commercials and if I should buy the newest P & P (my first copy was unfortunately crap - I guess that's what you get for buying it off of a cart in a back alley of Shanghai). Maybe by owning it, I wouldn't be sucked into watching it on tv;

8) I start thinking about how many people will use the excuse that they have seen the movie to justify not reading the book. This gets me really mad, especially in the case of the most recent P & P, since it leaves out major plot points. In regards to the BBC version, if you are going to watch 5 hours, just read the book!

9) And then I start thinking about casting and how Kate Winslet (yuck!) is in Sense and Sensibility, and I am sorry but Jennifer Ehle is Elizabeth Bennet, not Keira. And although I think the adaption is really good to put it in a current cultural context, it is weird to see Sayid from Lost as Bingley? And how do you go from directing Sense and Sensibility to Brokeback Mountain, Ang Lee?

I need to stop, I am getting just way too annoyed and fired up. Maybe Gweneth and Ewan can talk me down.